He's the star quarterback for a small Kentucky high school.
While the town worships him, I pray for God to take my life.
He makes my life a living hell by making me his victim.
This perverse game we play could end us both.
How can something that feels so right be so wrong?
The price if the truth is discovered is death, but I can't stop.
Neither can he.
No one can know.
Can I risk it?
REVIEW: 2.5 STARS
"We may fool around in the dark, but we can't hold hands in the light of day."
I am so disappointed. I mean, I really had super high hopes for this book and it just sorta fizzled out for me. What should have been an epic read just left me kind of hanging and needing something more. At first, I was seeing where it was going and I was really hoping it would continue on the upward trajectory it was starting out to have. Alas, it did not. I don't want this to sound overly angry, because taking a step back - this had the potential to be a great book, but this one definitely missed the mark. Many marks.
I am so disappointed. I mean, I really had super high hopes for this book and it just sorta fizzled out for me. What should have been an epic read just left me kind of hanging and needing something more. At first, I was seeing where it was going and I was really hoping it would continue on the upward trajectory it was starting out to have. Alas, it did not. I don't want this to sound overly angry, because taking a step back - this had the potential to be a great book, but this one definitely missed the mark. Many marks.
Right off the bat, there were some pretty cringy analogies and comments in the very first chapter that worried me for a quick minute - but other than that, Jaxon's words flowed, so I was hoping that maybe it was just a new voice and I had some "getting used to" that I had to wade through.
Jonah's struggles were very different than I had anticipated, which upped the ante for me even more. I could definitely appreciate the religious undertones but also that they were not preached to me, but felt strongly by the character. I liked that aspect of it. The likability of his character alone was actually quite easy in the beginning, given the very interesting dynamic between him and Roman - but I found something from both to hold onto and fall for by the ending. Even Mary, Jonah's sister, had something that I could smile at. Jonah's innocence as well as his curiosity are what drove him, and I liked that a lot, but his desire to be good in the eyes of his Lord and his father were what drew me in further. He struggled and I actually enjoyed that quite a bit because it definitely added that element of forbidden that I usually crave in my books. I enjoy reading about a character falling in love for the first time and all the excitement that surrounds the encounters and she gave me that smile, those butterflies, in the beginning. The sneaking around, the excitement - she laid that out really well because I was rooting for Jonah to explore that side of himself.
Now, Roman? He was a different one, for sure. The fact that there was more to hate than love about Roman in the beginning gave me that much more of a giddy feeling. You know, what is going to break him down? What's going to make him want to be a better person? The whole element to a bully romance. YESSSS!!! No. I am not so sure that he is even likable still, even after finishing the book. Good lord, that boy dealt with some messed up situations and I felt sorry for him. I cannot imagine going through what he did. I wanted to hug him. I also, just as much - if not more, wanted to punch him in his damn throat! He was mean (duh. bully) and very brutal with his outward actions and "responsibilities" that came with someone of his stature, but it was pretty rough and I struggled with finding and giving him redemption.
Some of the issues I had:
Some of the issues I had:
- A few scenes in particular bothered me and felt it was put it in there for shock and awe because it added nothing to the storyline, so it kind of turned me off for a bit.
- Some of the positioning didn’t work visually/mentally as her descriptions were slightly off. I think she had a mental picture of what she wanted to see, but it didn’t lay out that way with her wording. Same with some of her transitions from saying someone went somewhere - but then someone asked if they wanted help didn’t line up either. So, transitions and descriptions could use a better eye to weed out the inconsistencies, but again - a flow that was easy to follow in the grand scheme of things.
- I also didn't understand how each character knew the other person's feelings. Like, I was being told how they felt by the other person. I want to be in their head when they're telling me what they are feeling...I want to feel right along with them. I want to ache and hurt, smile and feel the excitement in their own words. Sadly, there was a lot of tell and very little feel.
- Unfortunately, some sentences just...stopped. Not only did we need at least another round of major editing, but finding out that the book had sentences that just ended abruptly and it was like I was left hanging mid-sentence made some of the flow jarring. Errors don't ever bother me in an ARC because I know they will go through at least another round of edits, but the errors in this one were blatant and LOUD. It made it difficult a few times to decipher her meaning. It should have been edited at least one more time before bloggers got it. That just looks lazy or rushed.
- The heaviness of the book was underserved by the writing, unfortunately. Very surface scratching and lacking growth and oomph. I kind of hoped it would have been written with a little more depth because I feel that would have benefitted their story better, even though the underlying message was loud and clear. I knew why most of everything happened (emphasis on most) and I could follow the story along quite easily, so that made it not become a DNF for me. A plus...
One of the things I enjoy about BULLY romances is the eventual understanding of the character's faults and growth as a person, as well as their love eventually becoming the air they need in order to breathe....to survive. Sooo, I feel like I got the stalker part down (from both male characters) - you know, that crazy need between the characters. But, I sure did miss out on the understanding of Roman's actions to not only Jonah, but Tyler as well. Shoot, Mary too! This one was rough in many, many ways. There was no cohesive matching of cause and effect, reasoning and understanding, lust and hate. The significance of Mary being used the way she was and her being ok with it just really struck a nerve with me, too. Especially when Jonah was jealous and excited about what Roman was doing with Mary.... {{shiver}} GROSS.
I'm very bummed that not only did the book NOT live up to the synopsis (which was beyond excellent) but also, the hype. I hate to say it, but I can easily name five authors that could have written this storyline with better conviction and more depth and emotion and it would have served this storyline much better. I feel like the writing lacked more than the storyline itself, and I think that's what I'm struggling with the most. If you want well written bully MM romance, this may not be the book for you. I am not sure this is one I can or will recommend.
I probably should have known I was going to be let down once I saw that cover.... {{sigh}}
"My body loves the way he touches me. It's exciting, new, and everything I crave."
~BEE
P.S. I know this sounds mean, and it is definitely critical, but I don't know how else to spell it all out without continually deleting and retyping. I'm frustrated with my inability to smooth it over a bit more. I wish I loved it more. I wish the writing were stronger. I wish I could scream out how amazing it was....
~MEET ANDI JAXON~
From Dyslexic kid with a love of Algebra to a published author, no one is more surprised to find me here, than I am. I love to write about tortured pasts and hot sex, a happily ever after that has to be worked for. My stories tend to be a little dark but with some comic relief, typically in the form of sarcasm.
~CONNECT WITH ANDI~
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